There’s no right or wrong way to be feeling. Nobody can know exactly how you’re feeling but they can give you support, sometimes the support you know you need - and ask for - and sometimes support you didn’t know you needed until it’s offered to you. Mothers were never meant to bring up babies and do as much as they do today, on their own… Have you ever heard of the expression ‘It takes a village’? As a mother to a newborn, sometimes you want to high five yourself when you finally manage to have a shower and eat breakfast before midday, other times you want to shut the door, hide and cry to release the indescribable emotions that you can’t make sense of. When our firstborn was just 8 weeks old, we moved to a completely new area, into a house renovation with no friends or family nearby. We were navigating the early months of becoming parents and I was on maternity leave away from people I had seen and spoken to day in, day out for a decade. Unsurprisingly, my confidence took a hit, every single aspect of life as I knew it had changed. My body was different, I was exclusively breastfeeding, some days everything with our baby just seemed to ‘work’ then the following day nothing did! Despite learning a lot about myself, and others, during this time, it’s probably not something I would do again all at once! I’ve always loved a challenge, I enjoy change and what it teaches you about life, about others and about yourself. The biggest thing I’ve learned since becoming a mum though is that it really is ok to not be ok sometimes and just as importantly, it’s also ok to say so. Asking for help isn’t a sign of failure but a sign that you know that you need support to not only survive this pivotal time in your life, but to continue to thrive. Looking back, I would have benefited from more support. Sometimes we have a tough day, week, month, year and that’s ok, we’re learning. We’re all learning to navigate this incredibly amazing and sometimes crazy journey which is life. You’re not alone, please talk to someone, be it a loved one, a friend or a complete stranger - remember that saying: “A problem shared is a problem halved”.14w
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